Quietude Counselling

How I can help

What brings people here.

People come to counselling for many reasons. Choose the one that feels closest to you.

Shall we talk?

Start with a free introductory call.

Book a free introductory call

Anxiety and worry

When your mind does not stop.

How it can feel

Your mind is already at tomorrow before today has started. You go over the same thought again and again, and it never feels finished. Your body is tense, your sleep is light, and small things feel big. From the outside you may look fine. Inside, being on alert all the time is exhausting.

What it is

Anxiety is the body and mind preparing for a danger. It becomes a problem when the alarm stays on, even when nothing is wrong in front of you.

How we can work on it together

We start by slowing down. I ask what the worry says, when it comes, and what it does to your day. Together we look at what keeps it going, and what it may be trying to protect. When it helps, I share practical tools you can use between sessions.

What can change

The worry may not disappear, and that is not the goal. Many people find they can notice it earlier, give it less room, and trust themselves more when it comes.

Book a free introductory call

Low mood

When everything feels heavy.

How it can feel

Getting up takes more effort than it should. Things you used to enjoy feel flat, and you are not sure when that started. You may be doing everything you need to do, and still feel far away from your own life. You might tell people you are just tired.

What it is

Low mood is more than a bad day. It can stay for weeks, and it often affects sleep, energy, appetite and how you see yourself. Some people call it depression. A diagnosis is for a doctor or a psychotherapist, and counselling can work alongside that care.

How we can work on it together

I do not ask you to feel better quickly. We look at what has been happening in your life, what you have been carrying, and what has gone quiet. We go at your pace, and we look for small things that are possible now. If I think you need more or different support, I will tell you and help you consider a referral.

What can change

People often say the first relief is not being alone with it. With time, many find a little more energy, a kinder way of talking to themselves, and a clearer idea of what they need.

Book a free introductory call

Stress and burnout

When you cannot switch off.

How it can feel

You finish the day and your head is still at work. Rest does not feel like rest. You are more irritable than you want to be, and things you used to manage now feel like too much. You keep saying it will be calmer next month.

What it is

Stress is a normal answer to pressure. Burnout is what can happen when the pressure goes on for too long and there is no real recovery.

How we can work on it together

First I listen to what your days are really like. We look at where the pressure comes from, what you expect from yourself, and where your limits are. We also talk about what you can change, what you cannot, and what you need to say to someone.

What can change

Many people start to notice their limits earlier and to respect them. Work may stay demanding. What can change is how much of you it takes.

Book a free introductory call

Feeling stuck or overwhelmed

When you do not know where to start.

How it can feel

You know something needs to change, but you cannot say what. Or there is so much to deal with that you do not know where to start. You think about it a lot and still end up in the same place. It can feel like everyone else knows what they are doing.

What it is

Feeling stuck is not laziness or weakness. Often it means there are too many things at once, or two needs pulling in different directions.

How we can work on it together

We look at things one at a time. I ask questions that help you separate what is urgent, what is important and what belongs to someone else. I do not tell you what to decide. I help you hear what you already think.

What can change

Things often look smaller once they are said out loud. People usually leave with a clearer next step, even a small one, and less noise around it.

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Life changes

When life does not look like before.

How it can feel

Something has changed, or is about to. A new job, a move, a baby, a separation, retirement. Even when you chose it, you may feel unsure of who you are in this new part. People expect you to be happy, or to be over it, and you are somewhere in between.

What it is

A life change asks you to leave something and learn something at the same time. It is normal for this to bring doubt, sadness and tiredness, even with good changes.

How we can work on it together

We give the change the time it needs. I ask what you are leaving, what you are keeping and what you are afraid of. We look at what has helped you through changes before, and what you want this next part to look like.

What can change

The change stays, but it can feel less like something happening to you. Many people find more confidence in their own choices.

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Living abroad

When home is in more than one place.

How it can feel

You built a life in a new country, and from the outside it works. But simple things take more energy here. You miss people, food, a way of joking. When you go back, that place has changed too, and you are not sure where home is.

What it is

Moving country is a big change, even years later. It can bring loneliness, a feeling of not belonging, and tiredness from always adapting.

How we can work on it together

I have lived and worked in three different countries, so I know something about starting again. I do not assume your experience is like mine. We talk about what you left, what you found, and what you are still looking for. You can do this in English or Italian, whichever feels closer.

What can change

People often feel less alone with it, and less guilty for finding it hard. Belonging can start to feel like something you build, in your own way.

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Relationships and communication

When the same argument comes back.

How it can feel

You have the same argument again, with different words. Or you stopped arguing, and now there is distance. You try to explain and it comes out wrong. It may be a partner, a parent, a friend or a colleague, and it stays in your head long after.

What it is

Most relationship difficulties are about patterns. Two people react to each other in ways that made sense once, and now keep them stuck.

How we can work on it together

We look at what happens in those moments, what you feel, what you say and what you do not say. We explore where your way of reacting comes from. We can also practise how to say something difficult more clearly.

What can change

You cannot change the other person. You can understand your part, ask for what you need, and decide what you want to accept. That often changes the conversation.

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Break-ups and separation

When a relationship ends.

How it can feel

The relationship has ended, or it is ending. Some days you feel relief, some days you cannot breathe. You go over what happened and what you could have done. The plans you had are gone too, and nobody talks much about that part.

What it is

A separation is a loss, even when it was the right decision. It often brings grief, anger, guilt and fear about the future, sometimes all in one day.

How we can work on it together

There is space here for all of it, including the parts that do not fit together. I listen to your story without taking sides. We look at what this relationship meant, what you are grieving, and what you want to take with you. If there are practical decisions, we can think them through slowly.

What can change

It usually still hurts, but it becomes easier to carry. Many people come to understand the relationship more clearly, and to feel more like themselves again.

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Grief and loss

When someone or something is missing.

How it can feel

Someone is missing, and the world carries on as normal. You may feel sad, angry, numb, or nothing at all for a while. Other people say kind things that do not help. You wonder if you are grieving the right way, or for too long.

What it is

Grief is the answer to losing someone or something that mattered. It has no fixed stages and no correct timeline. It can also come from losses people do not see, like a place, a role or a future you expected.

How we can work on it together

I do not try to fix grief or hurry it. I listen to who or what you have lost, and what that loss has changed. We can talk about the things that are hard to say to family or friends. We also look at what you need now, day by day.

What can change

The loss stays part of your life. With time and support, many people find they can remember with less pain, and make room for other things next to it.

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Self-esteem

When you are hard on yourself.

How it can feel

You notice everything you did wrong and very little of what you did well. A compliment feels uncomfortable. You compare yourself with others and you always come second. You may say yes when you mean no, because you do not want to disappoint anyone.

What it is

Self-esteem is how you see and value yourself. When it is low, an inner voice criticises you in a way you would never use with a friend.

How we can work on it together

We listen to that critical voice together. I ask where it learned to speak like that, and whose voice it sounds like. We look at what it leaves out. Slowly, we try out a more honest and kinder way of seeing yourself.

What can change

The critical voice may still be there, but it gets less power. People often find it easier to say what they think, to set limits, and to accept that they are enough as they are.

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Parenting

When you give everything and it still feels too little.

How it can feel

You love your children and you are exhausted. You lose patience and then feel guilty. There is very little time that is only yours, and you are not sure who you are outside this role. Everyone has advice. Few people ask how you are.

What it is

Becoming a parent changes your time, your body, your relationship and your sense of who you are. Finding it hard does not mean you are doing it badly.

How we can work on it together

Here you can say the things that are hard to say elsewhere, without being judged. We look at what you expect from yourself and where those expectations come from. We talk about your needs as a person, and how to ask for support. I do not give parenting rules. I help you trust your own way.

What can change

The days may stay full. Many parents find more patience with themselves, less guilt, and a little more room for who they are.

Book a free introductory call